11 Tips For Christian Parents from a Teenager’s Perspective

Introduction For Parents

Hello Seeds Family! My name is Brandon Houser, I am an 18-year-old Seeds Family Worship missionary who is passionate about music, the outdoors, and family ministry. I love being a part of the Seeds ministry and I enjoy helping others grow in their relationship with the Lord daily! The payoff of seeing Christ-centered homes and churches is well worth it, and I want to do what I can to be a part of that. 

Common Christian Parenting Questions 

My dad is Jason Houser, founder of Seeds Family Worship, so as you can imagine, I grew up around music and ministry. I have been to many family events and conferences with my dad over the years and watched him speak to parents of all ages. Along the journey, I’ve heard many Christian parents ask my dad about how to lead their home well, they asked questions like:

How do I raise my kids to love the Lord?

What am I called to do as a Christian parent?

How do I lead a Christ-centered family?

Although I have no idea what it is like to actually be a parent, I want to share what I saw in my parents that I appreciated. Of course, I probably didn’t fully appreciate it at the time, but now that I’ve graduated high school, I can look back with a new perspective. My mom and dad would be the first to say they’ve made mistakes. They weren’t perfect parents, and guess what, I wasn’t the perfect son, but I’m grateful for them. 

So for what it’s worth, here is the perspective of an 18-year-old on godly parenting. These are things that influenced me growing up and encouraged me to pursue the Lord.

• 11 Tips For Christian Parents •

1. Figure out who you are first

Growing up, I saw my mom and dad have confidence in who they were and who they were striving to be. This affected me more than I knew because so many of the values and traits my parents had were instilled in me before I could even think for myself. Who you are is who your kids will likely become. That’s why this next point was so important to me.

2. Spend consistent time with the Lord 

Spending consistent time with the Lord was probably the most important thing I watched my parents do. I constantly saw my dad listening to the audio Bible, going on prayer walks, or spending time talking about the Lord with others. This is so important because I was watching my dad closely and I wasn’t even meaning too.

Kids are pretty perceptive. If my parents had tried to lead us spiritually without spending their own time praying and in the Word, I think we would have noticed. I know personally that it can be challenging to make your relationship with God a priority, but it’s worth it. We can’t pour out what we don’t have. Refill your spirit continuously and the overflow will truly influence your kids.

3. Play Scripture music for your kids 

I remember my senior year when I was on the way to our state championship football game, stressing about the uncertainty of such a big moment. Then I heard the song Do Not Be Anxious playing over and over in my head. Those words brought me so much comfort at a time I needed it most. Because I grew up listening to Seeds music, it made it easy to remember the Bible. My parents played the songs in the car, throughout our home, and in daily life. I can’t tell you how thankful I am that my parents did this for me. Not only was the Lord using the fruit of their efforts to calm my heart at that moment, but He also blessed our team with a win!

Seeds Family Worship Music rooted Scripture in my heart and truly changed who I am today. I am so passionate about letting families know that playing Scripture songs is one of the easiest and most influential actions to growing your child’s faith. I’m guessing that if you play these songs for your kids, God will replay certain Bible verses in your child’s head too when they need it most.

4. Integrity in the small things

When I was about fifteen, my family was out at a restaurant together. I ordered food, grabbed a water cup, and headed over to the soda machine. But instead of water, I chose lemonade, thinking nothing of it. My dad sees this, says I shouldn’t steal from the restaurant, and goes and pays for a full drink. I’m thinking, “What’s the big deal? That cost them maybe half a penny!” He didn’t do it to try and teach me a lesson, he didn’t lecture me about having integrity at that moment, he simply lived out integrity right in front of me.

Living out integrity in the small things will teach your kids to do the same. It seems the opposite is often true as well. I’ve noticed with my friends who cut corners, they usually have parents who also cut corners. This goes back to the first point, figure out who you are first. A great Scripture song to listen to on this is Luke 16:10, “One who is faithful in a very little is also faithful in much, and one who is dishonest in a very little is also dishonest in much.”

5. Surround Your Kids with Godly Friends 

My parents have surrounded me with godly influences my whole life. I was always spending time with my extended family, church friends, and godly leaders that helped grow my faith. I attended youth camps & Vacation Bible Schools (VBS), and these moments changed me immensely, especially throughout high school. If you don’t know how to find godly friends for your kids, send them to a church camp or VBS. Not only will they be encouraged in their faith, but they will meet people to share it with.

6. Choose a few core values you want to instill in your kids

My parents did a great job of choosing the core values they wanted to pass on to us kids. They were always talking about them; around the dinner table, when we were out in the car, and especially during our Sunday night family times.

By doing this, my parents were leading our home in the direction they wanted it to go. They prayed about the core values they wanted their family culture to have, and then took intentional steps towards that. I didn’t realize how much I was watching my parents, but I truly started aiming for those same core values too.

7. Take Your Kid on a Passport2Purity weekend

FamilyLife has an amazing resource called Passport 2 Purity for pre-teens to go on a one-on-one weekend with one of their parents. It’s a fun and awkward-free (or, maybe less-awkward?) way to talk about sex, dating, marriage, and God’s design for purity. This weekend with my dad was so powerful and was such a bonding experience. I encourage all Christian parents to do this because it has had such a long-lasting influence on my life.

8. Consistently Pray for Your Family

I have always felt that there was prayer over my life, and a huge reason for that is my parents. They always told me they prayed this prayer, “God, we won’t know everything about our children, but let us know the things we need to know.” Their prayers helped create a Christ-centered home and changed the trajectory of my faith. Even when I would try and hide things from my parents they would always find out, I couldn’t get away with anything! (But it was good for me;) ). My parents would discipline me and it ultimately led me closer to the Lord. I’m so grateful they didn’t just pray, but prayed consistently because the Lord used this to work in my life.

9. Make your home a safe place to share

My family has always been a safe place for me to talk about struggles, hardships, and real-life; our culture has always been inviting. I always felt it was a safe place because my parents would not only invite us to share about life, but they would do it themselves by sharing the hard things they faced. Let your kids know that your home is a safe place by setting the example of sharing hard things.

10. Have Family Devotions Together

Family devotions can be a challenge, especially for my family. I didn’t make it easy either as I was usually the one running around with the busyness of life. Even with working through the difficulty of family devotions, there was so much fruit from it. It kept our family spiritually connected and aware of how everyone was doing. We didn’t do it perfectly, mom and dad didn’t have all the answers, but the Lord honored and blessed their efforts to pursue Him in family worship.

11. It’s better to be real than right

Pastor Craig Groeschel, says this about being a great leader, “It’s better to be always real rather than being always right.” I think the same applies to how my parents approached leading our family. I remember plenty of times during family devotions when I would ask a hard question, and instead of acting like he knew everything, my dad would simply say, “I don’t know.” I so appreciated that about him. If he would have acted like he knew it all, trying to look perfect, it would have been a big turn off.

I also appreciated that he didn’t just leave it there. When he didn’t know an answer, he went and looked for an answer and came back and shared what he found, which also helped us. My dad showed us Christ-like parenting by leading with humility. Having humility and being authentic with your kids will help them do the same.

Be encouraged and keep being Intentional

I hear that parenting can be difficult and not always pretty. I didn’t make it any easier for my parents either. These tips for Christian parents will help you see a teenager’s view of what I appreciated the most. I hope this blog will help you take the first step in the right direction towards family discipleship. Wanting to grow and being willing to try is the beginning of leading a Christ-centered home.  If you have any questions or feedback you can email me at brandon@www.seedsfamilyworship.com. I would love to hear from you. Thanks so much for reading!

Extra Resources For Christian Parents

• Seeds Family Worship Scripture Music is the best way to memorize the bible! Our word-for-word scripture songs make hiding the Bible in your heart very easy and enjoyable.

• Family Worship Guides help make Christian parenting simple. These are great resources for family devotionals together. These include lesson plans and activities to help engage your family in family devotions and invite Christ into your home!

• Memory Verse Cards are a free downloadable resource to help you memorize scripture! You can purchase physical paper memory verse cards for your kids to have with them also

• Seeds Family Worship Box brings “Discipleship to your Doorstep” which includes many family resources such as books, devotionals, music, and more to help grow your family discipleship.

• 20 Verses in 2020 is a free devotional series with multiple devotions breaking verses down to talk with your children. This is a great free resource to engage in family worship this 2020.

• Online Children’s Services is a free series of 20-minute services for your family or children’s ministry! These pre-recorded services include a short message, biblical stories and verses, and hand-motion worship videos.

Bible Verses That Give Biblical Parenting Advice

• Proverbs 22:6 – Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.
• Ephesians 6:4 – Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
• Proverbs 29:15 – The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother.
• Deuteronomy 6:7 – And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. (Scripture Song For Memorization – Impress Them | Deuteronomy 6:7) 
• Psalm 103:13 – As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him.